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I always take Scotch whiskey at night as a preventive of toothache. I have never had the toothache; and what is more, I never intend to have it.

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The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like, and do what you'd rather not.

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Wrinkles should merely indicate where smiles have been.

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Wrinkles should merely indicate where the smiles have been.

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Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.

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But old fools is the biggest fools there is.

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The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don’t want, drink what you don’t like, and do what you’d druther not.