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A lie can travel half way around the world while the truth is putting on its shoes.

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Never tell the truth to people who are not worthy of it.

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If a cat sits on a hot stove, that cat won't sit on a hot stove again. That cat won't sit on a cold stove either. That cat just don't like stoves.

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Now, then, that is the tale. Some of it is true.

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A clear conscience is the sure sign of a bad memory.

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Herodotus says, "Very few things happen at the right time, and the rest do not happen at all: the conscientious historian will correct these defects.

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A man is never more truthful than when he acknowledges himself a liar.

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Dates are hard to remember because they consist of figures; figures are monotonously unstriking in appearance, and they don't take hold, they form no ...more

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I went to Maui to stay a week and remained five. I never spent so pleasant a month before, or bade any place goodbye so regretfully. I have not once t...more

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The Bible has noble poetry in it... and some good morals and a wealth of obscenity, and upwards of a thousand lies.

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That's just the way: a person does a low-down thing, and then he don't want to take no consequences of it. Thinks as long as he can hide it, it ain't ...more

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A wise man does not waste so good a commodity as lying for naught.

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Life would be infinitely happier if we could only be born at the age of eighty and gradually approach eighteen.

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This nation is like all the others that have been spewed upon the earth--ready to shout for any cause that will tickle its vanity or fill its pocket. ...more

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A half-truth is the most cowardly of lies.