Comedy Quotes

I am a big fan of the old Howard Hawks films from the 30s and 40s, I was a big Hepburn and Tracey fa...

At least one way of measuring the freedom of any society is the amount of comedy that is permitted, ...

Life doesn't make any sense, and we all pretend it does. Comedy's job is to point out that it doesn'...

There is a thin line that separates laughter and pain, comedy and tragedy, humor and hurt.

All children in those small-town, unhurried days had a vast inner life going on in the movies. Child...

For the record, folks; I never took a shit on stage and the closest I ever came to eating shit anywh...

I like to watch the news, because I don't like people very much and when you watch the news ... if y...

A drug is not bad. A drug is a chemical compound. The problem comes in when people who take drugs tr...

The Ultimate Rule ought to be: 'If it sounds GOOD to you, it's bitchin'; if it sounds BAD to YOU, it...

Sin and grace, absence and presence, tragedy and comedy, they divide the world between them and wher...

... the preacher speaks both the word of tragedy and the word of comedy because they are both of the...

We’re so self-important. Everybody’s going to save something now. “Save the trees, save the bees, sa...

As it stands right now, I lead Richard Pryor in heart attacks, two to one. However, Richard still le...

There are no bad words. Bad thoughts. Bad intentions, and wooooords.

They’re not pro-life. You know what they are? They’re anti-woman. Simple as it gets, anti-woman. The...

If the shoe fits, buy another one just like it.

The animals were happy as they had never conceived it possible to be. Every mouthful of food was an ...

Laughter is the only free emotion - the only one that can't be compelled. We can be made to fear. We...

The world is a tragedy to those who feel, but a comedy to those who think.

Marriage is a wonderful institution, but who wants to live in an institution?

The Prince stood beside the timpanist to count his rests for him and see that he came in in the righ...

Adams dealt him so sound a Compliment over his Face with his Fist, that the Blood immediately gushed...

The effort really to see and really to represent is no idle business in face of the constant force t...

Here comes Mamma Vauquerr, fair as a starrr; and strung up like a bunch of carrots. Aren't we suffoc...

It seemed to us that all people to a greater or lesser degree belong to one of these two types, that...

Comedy, we may say, is society protecting itself - with a smile.

And I must draft an advertisement for the Daily Prophet, too,' he added thoughtfully. 'We'll be need...

Says O'Sullivan to me, "Mr. Fay, I'll have a word wid yeh?" "Certainly," says I; "what can I do for ...

The appreciative smile, the chuckle, the soundless mirth, so important to the success of comedy, can...

Comedy has to be done en clair. You can't blunt the edge of wit or the point of satire with obscurit...

I love doing comedy. Absolutely love it. After 'Wedding Crashers,' people suddenly realized that it ...

So my humor, I'd say, comes from a mixture of lowbrow comedy shows and highbrow theater. It's an int...

Comedy was one of those genres that while appearing quite jolly was actually highly dangerous.

Life is a comedy to those who think, a tragedy to those who feel.

We're all screwed up. And the way Christians mess things up is we act like we've got it going on. An...

How do i do this?

…you either do or do not have a comedy mind, whatever that is, maybe a heightened sense of the ridic...

I am driven. Being driven is my energy source. It is my fun.…I believe that where there is action, t...

I had a blind date with a dentist — and he told me to come back in six months.

The revelation that personal truth can be the foundation of comedy, that outrageousness can be clean...

The act of creation fascinates me. You can only sit with blank page and wait. You cannot press a but...

When you begin to losing your audience, do not get loud; get quiet, make them find you and come back...

Laughing made me feel safe. I was not going to be enveloped by the seediness that coated this world ...

Maybe that is why in my comedy I try and puncture the hypocrisy all around us, why it is almost a cr...

It gathers emotionally inside you, in a strange way a by-product of struggle, of a willingness to do...

Liked" was the kiss of death. "Loved" or "hated" interested him. At least the performer had aroused ...

Somehow, some way, every person in the arts has to find an accommodation with disappointment and emb...

I said, "Is there!" I told him there is a Mafia school where they teach them math — if Johnny has te...

…but I think comedy is more aggressive than that. It is a medium for revenge. We can deflate and pun...

People say it is not the key to happiness, but I have always figured if you have enough money you ca...

Everything comes out of smoke and mist and nothingness, a mystical happening…

I hate McDonald's. I don't want to order my dinner by yelling into a clown's mouth. If I want my fac...

To me, comedy is a great occupation because I don't really worry that much about what other people t...

Freedom from likes and dislikes, the sudden sense of identification, the spirit of comedy.

Michael Palin decided to give up on his considerable comedy talents to make those dreadfully tedious...

What are you assholes looking at?" "Nothing," said Radar. "We're certainly not looking at your eyebr...

That voice that cries out doesn't have to be a weakling's does it?

Olive was way beyond hearing anything, but her chin was set and she was determined to help the pilot...

Driving is boring," Rabbit pontificates, "but it's what we do. Most of American life is driving some...

I have some bad news. Bjork cannot be here tonight. She was trying on her Oscar dress and Dick Chene...

[Comedies], in the ancient world, were regarded as of a higher rank than tragedy, of a deeper truth,...

I love a good romantic comedy.

The problem is, these days you have to listen to too many parts of your body. Sometimes I go with my...

A lot of people come up here and they thank Jesus for this award. I want you to know that no one had...

It always pisses me off when I’m calling in to some Morning Zoo radio show to promote God-only-knows...

After graduation, I was floundering in L.A., doing stand-up comedy and working in a shoe store in th...

As soon as you have made a thought, laugh at it.

The only honest art form is laughter, comedy. You can't fake it...try to fake three laughs in an hou...

Satire is tragedy plus time. You give it enough time, the public, the reviewers will allow you to sa...

It’s absolutely stupid that we live without an ozone layer. We have men, we’ve got rockets, we’ve go...

One of the interesting things about comedy is it's tension release, and nothing creates tension fast...

They're so broke that they've actually cut essential services. In many places, they've cut policemen...

Lactose intolerant milk?! KISS, MY, DICK!

Each of us is full of shit in our own special way. We are all shitty little snowflakes dancing in th...

Just relax and breathe through your ass.

Aren't you sometimes frightened at being planted out here, with nobody to take care of you?''There's...

How is it you can talk so nicely?' Alice said, hoping to get it into a better temper by a compliment...

At any rate I'd better be getting out of the wood, for really its coming on very dark. Do you think ...

-"He loved her...It was noble of him. It was beautiful."-"It was stupid.

Breaking records is not something you expect to be doing. That's like a sports thing, it's not usual...

Fuck it... That's really the attitude that keeps a family together, it's not "we love each other", i...

Pamela, I’m in love with you. Yeah, it’s that bad. You’re so beautiful to me. Shut up! Lemme tell yo...

Breaking records is not something you expect to be doing. That's like a sports thing, it's not usual...

Fuck it... That's really the attitude that keeps a family together, it's not "we love each other", i...

Pamela, I’m in love with you. Yeah, it’s that bad. You’re so beautiful to me. Shut up! Lemme tell yo...

Breaking records is not something you expect to be doing. That's like a sports thing, it's not usual...

Fuck it... That's really the attitude that keeps a family together, it's not "we love each other", i...

Pamela, I’m in love with you. Yeah, it’s that bad. You’re so beautiful to me. Shut up! Lemme tell yo...

Breaking records is not something you expect to be doing. That's like a sports thing, it's not usual...

Fuck it... That's really the attitude that keeps a family together, it's not "we love each other", i...

Pamela, I’m in love with you. Yeah, it’s that bad. You’re so beautiful to me. Shut up! Lemme tell yo...

Bad improvisers block action, often with a high degree of skill. Good improvisers develop action."(p...

I have so much hate that it has turned into love.

To see a man slip on a banana skin is to see a rationally structured system suddenly translated into...

It could be worse... It could be raining

I'm sorry, but I can't make a movie with the blonde from 'ER' who is starring in every single bad ro...

The male is always the pawn in a romantic comedy. Come together, break up, go chase her, get her, ro...

Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you fall into an open sewer and die.

Magna Carta has become totemic. It is in the comedy of Tony Hancock, in the poetry of Kipling, never...

I think in life, the sense of humor and comedy always exists.