Satire Quotes

Human contacts have been so highly valued in the past only because reading was not a common accompli...

The Victrola, the Movies, a lecture: such are the three American alternatives to Silence, Scandal an...

Some men are born sodomites, some achieve sodomy, and some have sodomy thrust upon them...

Let Sporus tremble — "What? that thing of silk, Sporus, that mere white curd of ass's milk?Satire or...

Poetic justice, with her lifted scale,Where, in nice balance, truth with gold she weighs,And solid p...

While pensive poets painful vigils keep,Sleepless themselves, to give their readers sleep.

Nevertheless a certain class of dishonesty, dishonesty magnificent in its proportions, and climbing ...

When asked, "Why do you always wear black?", he said, "I am mourning for my life.

Thou shalt have one God only; whoWould be at the expense of two?No graven images may beWorshipped, e...

Satire is fascinating stuff. It's deadly serious, and when politics begin to break down, there is a ...

The people heard it, and approved the doctrine, and immediately practiced the contrary.

Now, Richard Pryor was unique. Many misunderstood his humor. He lit up the hallway, but they didn't ...

Did you know that the United States is ranked fiftieth in the world in life expectancy? And the fort...

And you are certainly not the pine-scented air.There is just no way that you are the pine-scented ai...

Sex is mathematics. Individuality no longer an issue. What does intelligence signify? Define reason....

Akthent on thee latht thyllable.

At Columbus Circle, a juggler wearing a trench cloak and top hat, who is usually at this location af...

This was the geography around which my reality revolved: it did not occur to me, ever, that people w...

The madrigore of verjuice must be talthibianised.

He has a very nice face and style, really," said Mrs. Kenwigs."He certainly has," added Miss Petowke...

Were you terrified, Murgatroyd?" Murgatroyd nodded eagerly. "There you go, girl: You're a terrorist....

She said when a boy and a girl dog copulate, the head of the boy's penis swells and the vaginal musc...

No, I say, it's fine.Put a gun to my head and paint the wall with my brains. Just great, I say. Real...

During the Cold War of the 1950s, American spies were issued eyeglasses with thick, clunky frames. I...

Right now, the economy is a whole lot like a fairly good-looking brain-dead chick in a persistent ve...

Ah! good Sir! no Whores before Dinner, I beseech

Quis custodiet ipsos custodes? Who will guard the guards?

A question, doctor," he said. "Why doesn't the coyote take the money he spends on bird costumes and ...

As an experienced editor, I disapprove of flashbacks, foreshadowings, and tricksy devices; they belo...

The walking tour guides one through the city's various landmarks, reciting bits of information the l...

The way I saw it, if my students were willing to pretend I was a teacher, the least I could do was r...

The woman spoke with a heavy western North Carolina accent, which I used to discredit her authority....

My mother was, for the most part, delighted with my brother and regarded him with the bemused curios...

Everything was fine, would continue to be fine, would eventually get even better as long as the supe...

We drove 22 miles into the country around Farmington. There were meadows and apple orchards. White f...

Steffie took my hand and we walked past the fruit bins, an area that extended about forty-five yards...

There was a certain amount of initial argumentation about the "meaning" of the balloon; this subside...

But that's men all over ... Poor dears, they can't help it. They haven't got logical minds.

Yes. They are the words that finally turned me into the hermit I have now become. It was quite sudde...

And so the problem remained; lots of the people were mean, and most of them were miserable, even the...

a politician is an arse uponwhich everyone has sat except a man

The news that she had gone of course now spread rapidly, and by lunch time Riseholme had made up its...

She's been, but she's coming back," he said. "I expect her every minute. Ah! there she is."This was ...

It was getting very clear then (and during this week Riseholme naturally thought of nothing else) th...

She was a gardener of the ruthless type, and went for any small green thing that incautiously showed...

On the doorstep Adele met Tony Limpsfield. She hurried him into her motor, and told the chauffeur no...

Marcia was silent a moment. Then a sort of softer gleam came into her angry eye."Tell me some more a...

She paused a moment."Pepino, shall I tell all our dear friends our little secret?" she said. "If you...

This little colloquy in Adele's box was really the foundation of the secret society of the Luciaphil...

This was all splendid stuff for Luciaphils; it was amazing how at a first glance she recognised ever...

Now Miss Mapp's social dictatorship among the ladies of Tilling had long been paramount, but every n...

Miss Mackintosh waved her arms wildly."Oh, please stop, and let me guess," she cried. "I shall go cr...

Luck ever attends the bold and constructive thinker: the apple, for instance, fell from the tree pre...

Miss Mapp moved towards the screen."What a delicious big screen," she said."Yes, but don't go behind...

Satire's nature is to be one-sided, contemptuous of ambiguity, and so unfairly selective as to find ...

Invisible things are the only realities.

Mysteries force a man to think, and so injure his health.

I don't do 'black music,' I don't do 'white music'...I make fight music, for high school kids.

At least one way of measuring the freedom of any society is the amount of comedy that is permitted, ...

Peter Pastmaster and the absurdly youthful colonel of the new force were drawing up a list of suitab...

We schoolmasters must temper discretion with deceit.

We, Seth, Emperor of Azania, Chief of the Chiefs of Sakuyu, Lord of Wanda and Tyrant of the Seas, Ba...

It [being very rich] used to worry me, and I thought it wrong to have so many beautiful things when ...

Her heart was broken perhaps, but it was a small inexpensive organ of local manufacture. In a wider ...

Most men are not wicked... They are sleep-walkers, not evil evildoers.

Incidentally, it’s easy to write prescriptions, but difficult to come to an understanding with peopl...

The robots came bearing a gift and the name of it was "Plenty."Plenty is a habit-forming drug. You d...

[On school uniforms] Don't these schools do enough damage making all these kids think alike, now the...

Processions, meetings, military parades, lectures, waxwork displays, film shows, telescreen programs...

TWO AND TWO MAKES FIVE

I merely repeat, remember always your duty of enmity towards Man and all his ways. Whatever goes upo...

This work was strictly voluntary, but any animal who absented himself from it would have his rations...

The animals were happy as they had never conceived it possible to be. Every mouthful of food was an ...

Windmill or no windmill, he said, life would go on as it had always gone on--that is, badly.

American political culture quickly and always outpaces any attempt to satirize it.

I believe in Supreme Being, a Creator, whoever he may be, it's of no importance to me, who put us he...

Uh, excuse me, sir, I, uh, don't known how to uh, to uh, tell you this, but you were three minutes l...

They who suspect a Mephistophiles, or sneering, satirical devil, under all, have not learned the sec...

The effort really to see and really to represent is no idle business in face of the constant force t...

Tides are like politics. They come and go with a great deal of fuss and noise, but inevitably they l...

You are very fond of bending little minds; but where little minds belong to rich people in authority...

Nobody could catch cold by the sea; nobody wanted appetite by the sea; nobody wanted spirits; nobody...

After having so nobly disentangled themselves from the shackles of Parental Authority, by a Clandest...

Sophia shrieked and fainted on the ground – I screamed and instantly ran mad. We remained thus mutua...

Our time was most delightfully spent, in mutual Protestations of Freindship, and in vows of unaltera...

She is probably by this time as tired of me, as I am of her; but as she is too Polite and I am too c...

Dear Eloisa (said I) there’s no occasion for your crying so much about such a trifle. (for I was wil...

Provided that nothing like useful knowledge could be gained from them, provided they were all story ...

I was only hit on once at the grocery store. I remember it was early one Saturday morning and I was ...

Going into the Republican Party National Convention, in all objective truth, our non‑winning front‑r...

Mitt Romney's first interview with Zombie Reagan: Mitt Romney came in with cheerful assurance, beca...

Where did you find construction guys swapping dirty jokes in proto-Númenorean?” Aura asked.“On const...

That Reagan shaped mechanical gadget in the metal box that made you jump like a little sissy boy, Jo...

Of course you would, Mitt," Reagan said. "Well, I’m glad we understand each other, and I think your ...

... they only trusted the wisdom of people brighter and more worldly than themselves when it was exp...

I tossed my shoulders and swaggered away, whistling with pleasure. In the gutter I saw a long cigare...

So you've been gone a couple days,' Alison said. 'Hmm, what'd you miss...A celebrity did drugs. Poli...

Is my paranoia getting completely out of hand, or are you mongoloids really talking about me?

Mr Kingsley begins then by exclaiming- 'O the chicanery, the wholesale fraud, the vile hypocrisy, th...

Yet, Malice never was his Aim;He lash'd the Vice but spar'd the Name. No individual could resent,Whe...