Irony Quotes

If I wasn't a devil myself I'd give Me up to the Devil this very minute.

I've often heard it said, a preacherMight learn, with a comedian for a teacher.

Die? I should say not, dear fellow. No Barrymore would allow such a conventional thing to happen to ...

Where did you find construction guys swapping dirty jokes in proto-Númenorean?” Aura asked.“On const...

to travel faster than a speeding bullet is not much help if you and it are heading straight towards ...

Why should I struggle through hundreds of pages of fabrication to reach half a dozen very little tru...

He was one of the most supremely stupid men I have ever met. He taught me a great deal.

In spite of her superficial independence, her fundamental need was to cling.All her life was an atte...

The next morning I had Twentieth-Century American Poetry at MCC. This old woman gave a lecture where...

Here was the world-famous novelist with her penchant for detail; yet, in her observations of a prost...

You say ‘cure.’ I hear ‘you’re not human enough.

Look now—in all of history men have been taught that killing of men is an evil thing not to be count...

Curley's wife lay with a half-covering of yellow hay. And the meanness and the plannings and the dis...

the weekly thirty minutes of sexual stress was a chronic but low-grade discomfort, like the humidity...

As learnèd commentators viewIn Homer more than Homer knew.

...You know, one good apple can spoil the rest,” Colonel Korn concluded with conscious irony.

General Peckem even recommends that we send our men into combat in full-dress uniform so they'll mak...

Cats are rather delicate creatures and they are a subject to a good many different ailments, but I h...

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I took the road less traveled by and they CANCELLED MY FRIKKIN' SH...

The thing about changing the world... Once you do it, the world's all different.

A mouth of no distinction but well practiced, before I entered my teens, in irony. For what is irony...

Irony - The modern mode: either the devil’s mark or the snorkel of sanity.

If you turned your back on irony, it curdled into sarcasm. And what good was it then? Sarcasm was ir...

We all want to be special, to stand out; there's nothing wrong with this. The irony is that every hu...

Her beauty was a weapon. A loaded gun, with the barrel pointed at her own head.

She'd been a good nurse, and now she'd never be a nurse again. She was bitter about it and had turne...

I am waiting for the war to be fought which will make the world safe for anarchy

How strange it was to think that he, who such a short time ago dared not believe in the happiness of...

A modern philosopher who has never once suspected himself of being a charlatan must be such a shallo...

I wish I hadn't cried so much!" said Alice, as she swam about, trying to find her way out. "I shall ...

So, now I've been to see a drug counselor who told me I need to lay off the drugs and talk about my ...

Probably it is impossible for humor to be ever a revolutionary weapon. Candide can do little more th...

Anyway, if the Cetagandans really wanted to assassinate you, they'd hardly do it here. They'd slip s...

Poets speak of hope in ladies smiles, but give me a smirk any day, I say.

As soon as you say it about a record, you're like some little zombie in a funny dungeon.

It's funny how a person can be right all the time and still be wrong.

You could write a book about things that you can't find on-line.

Somewhere fate laughs in her far-off country, because now I am the human and it is Grace I will lose...

There's a large strain of irony in our human affairs... Interwoven with our affairs is this wonderfu...

Many a small thing has been made large by the right kind of advertising.

He had had much experience of physicians, and said 'the only way to keep your health is to eat what ...

Everybody granted that if "Tom" were white and free it would be unquestionably right to punish him--...

In Paris they just simply opened their eyes and stared when we spoke to them in French! We never did...

My father could be very witty, even if the humor was always on the darker side of irony.

You can put anything into words, except your own life

Trapped. Sinking. Can't be myself. Made into what other people expect. Is that everyone's fate? Were...

The blessing of the omnivore is that he can eat a great many different things in nature. The curse o...

We must uncover our rituals for what they are: completely arbitrary things, tied to our bourgeois wa...

It may well be that we talk about sex more than anything else; we set our minds to the task; we conv...

I quote others only in order the better to express myself.

What is all this? Get him out of here, devil take me!” And that one, imagine, smiles and says: “Devi...

We’ve known for a long time that it was no longer possible to overturn this world, nor reshape it, n...

Most people willingly deceive themselves with a doubly false faith; they believe in eternal memory (...

It is a tragicomic fact that our proper upbringing has become an ally of the secret police. (...) Th...

He won’t stop the war until you give him the peace prize.

In a nutshell, I am not unaware of my failings. Neither am I a stranger to irony.

The best way to measure the loss of intellectual sophistication - this "nerdification," to put it bl...

That Jim Crow there in the window," answered the urchin, holding out a cent, and pointing to the gin...

Trusting no man as his friend, he could not recognize his enemy when the latter actually appeared.

What a refreshing mind you have, young man. There really is nothing quite like total ignorance, is t...

That was his mother. When she wasn't crying over the breakfast cereal, she was laughing about killin...

For 'wellness', naturally is no cause of complaint--people relish it, they enjoy it, they are at the...

The beauty and mystery of this world only emerges through affection, attention, interest and compass...

I hardly think that any Socialist, nowadays, would seriously propose that an inspector should call e...

Irony is wasted on the stupid

Even things that are true can be proved.

You cut life to pieces with your epigrams.

A million years ago - some hairy bastard daubed a horse on the wall of his cave, he saw it, he drew ...

The newly-minted captain is told to let nothing stop him but to do nothing that would risk his ship ...

Irony is the attendant of hope and the fuel of hope is innocence.

God hides the fires of hell within paradise.

I think people under age 55 come to Vegas with a certain sense of irony.

And on the pedestal these words appear:'My name is Ozymandias, king of kings:Look on my works, ye Mi...

[sic] his reaction was a sign of civilization. Nobody reaches for a gun anymore, just for his lawyer...

How much truth is contained in something can be best determined by making it thoroughly laughable an...

If you think this Universe is bad, you should see some of the others.

Just as she was unaware of the hidden currents of politics running below the surface of College affa...

You would compliment a coxcomb doing a good act, but you would not praise an angel.

The ironist is ironical not because he does not care, but because he cares too much.

I'm being ironic. Don't interrupt a man in the midst of being ironic, it's not polite. There!

Common sense is the most widely shared commodity in the world, for every man is convinced that he is...

God’s in His heaven—All’s right with the world!

What has our culture lost in 1980 that the avant-garde had in 1890? Ebullience, idealism, confidence...

A graduation ceremony is an event where the commencement speaker tells thousands of students dressed...

... the novel, arguably the author's best, had a disquieting power, like a sleeping crocodile.

Nobody steals books but your friends.

He smelled the smells of commerce and listened to the cursing of the sailors, both of which he admir...

Do you work for the government, any government?”"I pay taxes, which means I work for the government,...

In the State of Denmark there was the odor of decay...

To paraphrase Oedipus, Hamlet, Lear, and all those guys, "I wish I had known this some time ago.

A DEAD STATESMANI could not dig: I dared not rob:Therefore I lied to please the mob.Now all my lies ...

VLADIMIR: Moron!ESTRAGON: Vermin!VLADIMIR: Abortion!ESTRAGON: Morpion!VLADIMIR: Sewer-rat!ESTRAGON: ...

Depend upon it, sir, when a man knows he is to be hanged in a fortnight, it concentrates his mind wo...

I don’t know whether Asimov realized he was saying this as well, but as an old historical materialis...

These were always the weirdest trips for me, when it was midnight or even later, and we pulled up to...

A united front announcing a split.

The irony of informing nearly naked people in a wilderness setting about the story of naked Adam and...

I always think it's funny when Indians celebrate Thanksgiving. I mean, sure, the Indians and Pilgrim...

[Or perhaps my friends should have realized that they shouldn't have left behind the FRICKING REASON...

What one should add here is that self-consciousness is itself unconscious: we are not aware of the p...